


Not Mine To Keep

by PsychoStar



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Sauli Koskinen RPF, Tokio Hotel
Genre: Angst and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-24
Updated: 2013-04-24
Packaged: 2017-12-09 09:38:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/772730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PsychoStar/pseuds/PsychoStar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sauli did it again. </p><p> </p><p>Eek! It's my first time pairing Sauli with someone else! lol</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Mine To Keep

The back of his head was all it took for me to recognize him, he’s impossible to forget.

 

I don’t even think about it for a second, I knew there was no point in ignoring him, it would just be rude of me. Sure we haven’t talked in a while, but it was for the best, now that he’s here, though, I find myself behind him.

 

“Hey there, stranger!” I tap his shoulder, the memory of the first time I did that hurts a bit, it always will. He slowly turns around, the people he was talking to were already leaving… they probably recognized me.

 

“Adam?” His voice is half surprised and half… I’m not really sure what. Maybe he was expecting someone else?

 

“Hey.” He drops the surprised face and smiles, warm and true, then hugs me lightly, a bit too lightly for him.

 

“Hey, you’re back from touring?” We both sit back down at the bar and I order a drink.

 

“Yeah, got home yesterday… still jet lagged, you know.” I really hope he’s response wouldn’t be a simple “yeah” because that would lead to an awkward silence and then pointless small talk. We should be passed that now, it more than two months since we last spoke and about five since we broke up.

 

“I have some Ambien on me… but I don’t think it’s a wise choice to take it now.” We laugh, and sipped on our drinks.

 

“So you’re back from Finland?” Last we spoke he said he was going back to Finland for a little while. I was scared to ask why, maybe it was because of me, or maybe not, but anyway I knew that him leaving would separate us for good, not that we broke our friendship, but it was too hard for me to pick up the phone and talk to him while he was so far away and he didn’t call either. As I come out of my deep thoughts I realize that he’s hesitating to answer.

 

“Yeah… I only stood there for a week, something came up.”

 

“Oh, sorry I didn’t call… I…”

 

“I know, it was hard at the time.”

 

“Did you leave because of me?”

 

“Well, you were back into your party boy, hooking twinks act and it was hard to see, but that wasn’t why I left. You kept asking if I was ok every time we talked.”

 

“Sorry that must have been annoying.”

 

“No more annoying than the fact that I wasn’t ok, I was lying so you wouldn’t feel hurt, but even though I called us off I was still jealous and that wasn’t fair to you, I needed time away.” Even though I moved on, I still see him as the perfect man.

 

“So, what happened? You said something came up, so you came back here, hope nothing bad?”

 

He didn’t get a chance to answer, because in the next moment the thing that I dread most happening… happened, someone that came up from behind me, moved quickly between us, leaned over Sauli and grabbed his face, kissing him deeply. I almost dropped my drink.

 

“Bill.” I heard Sauli say softly and then my shock grew even further, the person that pried himself off of Sauli’s lips turned his head to me. Blond shoulder length hair, shadowy eyes, pierced lip… I immediately recognized the face, but even so, if Sauli hadn’t said the name I would have thought I’m confusing him or rather hallucinating, or having a seriously perverted dream.

 

“Oh, scheisse, sorry, I really didn’t mean to interrupt, I didn’t kno-“

 

“It’s ok, love, we weren’t discussing anything important, we were just catching up.” Sauli smiles at Bill and Bill at him and both they’re eyes sparkle.

 

“Hey Adam, it’s nice to see you again.” My hand moved instinctively to grab his, even though my jaw was still hanging to my knees. “Sorry to intervene, Sauli told me all about you… only good thing, of course.” His accent seems to be getting loads better, you might not even be able to tell he’s German and his looks haven’t change much.

 

“He didn’t know about us.” Sauli whispered to Bill, but it was enough for me to hear it too.

 

“Well, that explains the shock, I was beginning to think it was because of my clothes or something.” They both giggle and I try to pull myself together.

 

“I—it’s not that…I umm, I expected Sauli to be dating, I just didn’t know you were…”

 

“I wasn’t… not publically. The deal with the management was that I didn’t announce that I was bisexual until I actually started dating a guy, only family and friends new. But I came out the second Sauli and I got together.” Great… his old crush and his old boyfriend were dating. Just perfect. “BUT… I am now officially intruding on ex-boyfriend talk, so excuse me” I just noticed that he had two drinks in hand; he probably brought one for Sauli…

 

“N-no, it’s ok you can stay.”

 

“Well, I came here looking for Tom, actually, so I getter go find him anyway. I’ll see you two later.” They kissed again... just a short smack on the lips and he was off, long legs helping him disappear in seconds.

 

“Wow… was not expecting that… I guess I have really been avoiding the media, how else could I miss _that_.” Sauli laughs again and shakes his head at my dorkiness.

 

“Believe it or not, the fuss died down fast, at lease here in the US, Germany is probably still mourning.”

 

There was another moment of silence, but not because I didn’t know what to say, because I wanted to say too much, and I didn’t know if I was allowed.

 

“I didn’t think you would start dating another celebrity any time soon… shit that came out wrong.” But Sauli laughs again.

 

“Oh, yeah, you know me… fame hoggin’ here, fame hoggin’ there…” We both laugh, but then he got serious. “I didn’t either, I was fantasizing about maybe a farmer’s boy or something really under the radar, really, after that wild time with you I wanted a guy that would wake up at four in the morning, milk the cows and then come back, give me a blow job, and spend the rest of the day in bed… but Bill… he shot himself into my heart just as fast as you did.”

 

“I wasn’t criticizing you, I know you don’t make the same mistake twice.”

 

“You were never a mistake, Adam, you were an amazing part of my life that I will never forget.”

 

“But he’s different, right?”

 

“Yes… he’s… well he’s always there, I don’t know if it’s the extra years he has in this business or the fact that he’s even bossier than you, but he always makes time for me, he’ll never let a day go by without spending at least a few hours together. And even when he’s on tour… sorry, I feel like I’m the one criticizing you now.”

 

“Hey, it’s ok, it’s good to know what I did wrong, it’ll be useful in a future relation… please go on”

 

“When he’s on tour he’ll call me every night before I go to sleep and talk or sing to me until I fall asleep… he’ll answer his phone even if he’s in the middle of a press conference and he would never leave me at a party to go give an interview… I’m not sure if it’s true or not, but I really feel like he’s putting me before his fame.”

 

“Well… then I have a long way to go, huh?” I did everything Sauli just listed backwards, I realized I was putting fame before love, but I can’t change that and Sauli didn’t ask me to.

 

“You were never a bad boyfriend, Adam, I just wanted more than you were offering… but we had this discussion, I can see it in your eyes that you’d rather not have it again, so let’s move on… are you seeing anyone?”

 

“Huh? Oh… right… no, Sutan is fixing me up with a friend of his tomorrow, but who knows how that’ll go.” I strung, Sutan and I do not have the same taste in men.

 

“Aww, well I trust him to at least pair you a good hook up.” Sauli laughs and sips up the rest of his drink, out conversation was over, it was time for one of us to excuse themselves and go find another place at the bar… or home with the boyfriend.

 

“Hey, before I leave… can I just ask something?” I ask, Sauli smiles, it’s a yes and I know it.

 

“So tops?”

 

“Oh god, Adam!” He pretends to throw his drink on me, but it was mostly empty.

 

“As your dumped ex it is my right to know this!” Sauli flipped me the bird and before I knew it he locked himself in my arms. “Now, you give a proper hug!” I chuckle, I was genuanly happy for him and that made realize there’s hope for me too.

 

“You retard… don’t wait another couple of months to get in contact with me.” He sniffles as he talks, I was an asshole for thinking that I shouldn’t call him, but now I know better.

 

“I won’t, I might phone you tomorrow, to let you know how my date went… if it doesn’t turn out to be a hook up after all.” He both giggle still hugging and then Sauli started pulling off, he was not mine to keep anymore.

 

“It’s a very, very versatile relationship…” He whispers in my ear before pulling off me and walking away into the crowd.

 

“Fuck…” I slam a couple of bucks on the bar and start running towards the exit, not because I was sad, jealous, angry or disappointed, but because I had a major bonner that needed taking care of.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want a smut follow up on this let me know! ;)
> 
>  
> 
> I'm actually woking on another Sauli/Adam/Bill multi chapter but it's completely an allternative universe and BDSM-ish. Wanna read it? :D


End file.
